Resultados narrador por "Jessica Almasy" en Todas las categorias

With a new job I didn’t apply for and an extended family I didn’t know I had - midlife has become somewhat problematic. Gluing ghosts back together is easy compared to my new celestial occupation. The Grim Reaper wants to put a ring on it. Tim wants to be a father. Candy Vargo has lost her damn mind, and Jennifer thinks we’re all sparkly vampires. I’ve been given an impossible task with catastrophic consequences for failure, but it wouldn’t be my midlife without another crisis.

Imagine your least favorite class from school. The one you hate showing up to because you can’t stand the teacher - and maybe the feeling is mutual, even though they can’t admit it. You hate the subject, and you’re miserable the entire period, every day, every second. None of your friends are there, and even if they are, you can’t hang with them. You just sit and do your work. No talking. No bathroom breaks. Now, imagine that the class has several aggressively strict teachers, and those teachers have superpowers. In fact, they’re the most powerful people on the planet.

Never in my 40 years did I think my new normal would be gluing body parts back onto ghosts and hosting a houseful of dead squatters. Thank God for superglue and a strong stomach. Never thought I’d date the Grim Reaper and that I would be the one to blow it. I mean, how idiotic does one have to be to get dumped by a dude who lives in Hell? Going about business as usual is not usual in any way. No one is who they seem to be...and to be honest, neither am I. What I’d known to be true has turned out to be myth. The angels are frightening, and the demons are hot.

With my life back to normal - normal being a very relative word - one would think I’d catch a break. One would be very wrong. With an angel gunning for me and a demon in my bed, life couldn’t be more complicated. Not to mention, I’m going to have to make a rather large life choice. Do I want to live forever? Does anyone? Forever is a very long time. Whatever. I’ll think about it tomorrow...or next week...or next month. As long as I have my girlfriends, my dogs, a super-sized case of merlot, and my deceased squatters, I’m good to go.

Thirty-nine was a fantastic year. I was married to the man I loved. I had a body that worked without creaking. My grandma, who raised me, was still healthy, and life was pretty damned good. But as they say, all good things come to an end. One year later, I’m a widow. My joints are starting to ache. Gram is in the nursing home, and dead people think my home is some kind of supernatural bed-and-breakfast. Gluing body parts onto semi-transparent people has become a side job - deceased people I’m not even sure are actually there.

After a Luke Skywalker/Darth Vader moment, I discovered I do indeed have a father. He comes with a hell of a lot of baggage, but I’ve decided to keep him. Not only do I have a father, I have a kick-ass new sister, a ghostly family, and super powers to boot. If you add to the mix that I’m dating the Grim Reaper, it’s a freakin’ party. The only thing standing in the way of my happiness is the Angel of Mercy, though Angel of Misery is more appropriate. She’s responsible for almost everyone I have loved, and who has loved me, being taken away.

Being 40 is supposed to be freaking fabulous, not fatal. Taking on a daunting new job minus the description isn’t the smartest move I’ve ever made, even if it was to save a friend. Hopefully, it doesn’t turn out to be the stupidest...or deadliest. Why can’t things stay the way they were? I love my old job. Supergluing ghosts back together and solving their issues is its own reward. Not to mention, I’m seriously good at it. Although, I must say, I’m ridiculously excited for the new Death Counselor’s arrival in nine months....

Wow. Who saw that coming? I know I didn’t. As you know, I’m the Red Raptor. Now that things have...changed, I’ve asked my friend Amy to help tell the story. No, seriously, she’s just a friend. I mean - I guess if it were up to me? But...no. Okay, so there’s a new threat - a bunch of punks called the Neon Knights. They’re causing mayhem, armed with some kind of plasma-photon-light weapons that I can’t even begin to understand, and as usual, I’ve gotta stop them. However, this time I’ve got help. That’s right, I formed my own superteam. One for the ages.

With Ethan by my side, along with new friends and a few well-hidden enemies, it’s time to adjust my crown, put a few Vampyres in their place, and kick some Zombie butt. I’m dead. Life is still good. I have unconditional love. And on most days, when I’m not covered in Zombie guts, I’m wildly fashionable. Fashionably dead, that is, and loving it.

For twenty-two-year-old Julia, just out of college, Vancouver has become a social wasteland. Her boyfriend has gone off to London to study art history, leaving her feeling abandoned in the not-quite-derelict historic apartment where she is alone - surrounded by people. While working a series of odd jobs, Julia inadvertently befriends Oliver, one of her aloof neighbors.

If only reality could resemble the fantasy of what pregnancy is supposed to be like - the brimming excitement, the feelings of significance, a healthy glow. But for Jenny, a young mother-to-be recently relocated from NYC to the suburbs, pregnancy hasn't done a thing to cure her incessant self-doubt and loneliness.

When Kate, a physics grad student recently dumped by her professor boyfriend, gets a frantic phone call from a childhood friend, she's more than happy for the distraction. Though she hasn't seen the luminous Lana in years, she can tell Lana's crisis is genuine: her younger sister's joined the Sisters of the Northern Star. The real story - of forgiveness, friendship, and lost hope - unfolds as the two drive from New York to Nevada to collect Lana's sister from a cult that may not be as dangerous as it seems.

With chick lit novels popping up on every best seller list, millions of listeners are all thinking the same thing: I could write this stuff. I could write a best seller and never go back to the office again! And here’s the guide that will show you how. Best-selling novelist Sarah Mlynowski and veteran chick lit editor Farrin Jacobs cover every stage of developing and selling your soon-to-be best-selling novel....

Apparently, there’s no rest for the over-forty crowd. Yes, I have fabulous friends. Yes, I have a beautiful baby. Yes, the ghosts are coming back home. Yes, I’m in love with the Grim Reaper. However, that sexy Demon has got some major ’splainin’ to do … like his possible involvement in the shocking kidnapping of my worst and most deadly enemy. With a drag queen and an ice queen as my back up, we’re going to sashay away into the Darkness to find the truth and turn a wrong into a right. Although, I’m learning fast that black and white are often clouded with shades of gray.

The rich bloodsuckers don’t want to pay taxes. Too bad, so sad. They’re the least of my problems right now. At the wise suggestion of my beloved mate, I indulge in a little retail therapy so I don’t dismember the pissed-off crew of greedy Vamps who don’t want to pay their fair share. How could a trip to the happiest place on earth a.k.a. Target go wrong? Let me count the ways....

Katie has reached the fifth floor of the dungeon and met with the ruler of the Abyss, where she learned that her previous actions have rendered her fetch quest uncompletable. Rather than give in to despair, she’s decided on a new quest: to escape the dungeon she’s trapped in and defeat the demon lord herself. With her body already warped into something inhuman, gaining a third class that has some rather detrimental effects on the fabric of reality doesn’t help her stay grounded. It does, however, grant her even more power. Will there be anything in the real world capable of standing up to her?

Katie has successfully reached the third floor of the dungeon in which she accidentally stranded herself, but with enemies both ahead and behind her, she’s having to fight hard for every step she takes. Still, at least she finally found an ally, even if that ally was her.

With a show to produce and my career as an actress on the line, I really don’t have time to die—especially violently. However, while that might not be on my agenda, it seems to be on other’s. Awesome. Instead of acting in my latest endeavor, I’m playing the real-life role of Reluctant Demon Who Has To Save The World—or at the very least, the hot hero.

Oh great hero! The evil Demon Lord has once again arisen to terrorise our lands, and we have summoned you to save our people! No, we don't want you to fight the demon lord! Of course not; we're the good guys! What sort of good guys kidnap people from other worlds and force them to take part in wars that have nothing to do with them? That would just be plain evil! We'd be no better than the demons!